anniversary of sorts

Today marks 52 weeks anyway since the first time I went to Travis Park Methodist church in downtown San Antonio. I went for the first time because I had been looking for a church in San Antonio, but that church and that week because I had a date with an amazing woman who also happened to be a Sunday school teacher there.

And so it is a year that I have been in earnest dating. I had met a couple of women before this date, but Alisa is the first woman I would really consider dating. We had an amazing first date; my brother came and picked up Katie from church for me, and we walked around the River Walk until our feet hurt, and then we stopped for lunch and spent three hours talking, laughing, crying at some place I had never seen before or since. I couldn't tell you the name of the place without checking my old credit card statements. Quite frankly, I was oblivious to everything else but this amazing, gorgeous woman that had me captivated in a way I didn't think would be possible again.

It is amazing to me that it was only four and a half months after Becky died. If someone asked me for advice I would tell them it was crazy to start a relationship so soon after losing a spouse. It is amazing that we dated for a couple of months - no relationship save with my mother and Katie has had more of an impact on my life than that one. Of course, that is in part because of the friendship that has developed between us. It took the better part of this year for me to finally close the door in my mind of getting back together, even as I dated other women. There is no question in my mind that God put this woman in my life.

Not long after we had decided to stop dating, I realized and told her that Gonzo the Great was wrong when he said, "there's not a word yet/for old friends that just met." For me, that word is Alisa. Except maybe it isn't anymore. It is no longer true that we have just met. But that we will be old friends is really only dependent on the length of time we are granted on this earth. A year ago Monday was the greatest date I have ever been on, hands down. I celebrate it in my mind's eye because we are headed back to the scene of the crime for church tomorrow.

And that is maybe the most amazing thing about that time dating. It solidified my relationship with TPUMC. I have not felt as comfortable in a church since high school, back in the days before the Catholic Church decided to ignore that Vatican II ever took place. Travis Park is my home now. I am still Catholic; that was affirmed for me almost two years ago when my grandmother died. During the memorial mass, I understood as never before how quietly I am moved by the Catholic liturgy. It is what Marcus Borg refers to as a "thin place" I think, when the barrier between man and God is thinnest. For me, that still happens in a unique way at mass, and so you will see me there from time to time. But at the same time, the church is wrong on so many things, and I just can't stomach to be a regular Catholic church-goer.

And so now I am a Catholic and a Methodist, and I am so at home in this church. It is a church where my politics are welcome; in fact, it is a place where my politics are challenged and stretched. I love the Phil Ochs song, "Love Me, I am a Liberal." I will have to post the lyrics here, but not before bed tonight anyway. This is a church that caters to the needs of the most marginalized citizens in San Antonio: the homeless, the mentally ill, the addicts. We serve breakfast Sunday mornings, and we have a medical clinic and eye clinic and free showers for the people of the streets.

When I first got to this church, I thought we were doing these things because it transformed their lives. And I hope and pray that it does. But the real reasons we do these things is that it transforms our lives, and quite frankly because the call of God and Jesus simply demands it. The gospels are not suburban and they are not comfortable. I encountered that for the first time in summer 1990 when I read the Cost of Discipleship by Deitrich Bonhoffer. It is a book that almost made me into an agnostic because I realized I couldn't do what the gospel called me to do. Still can't. Not by a country mile. But I try, and we try, and hopefully we can create a little chunk of the kingdom of God right here in the heart of San Antonio. If you find yourself in South Texas, come on by. The 11 am service is amazing, and you can count on Katie and I being there if we are within 100 miles.